10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• I'm enough of a dreamer to realize it might have been that elusive something a gambler calls luck. But, I'm also enough of a realist to know that in general we make our own luck - through knowledge, skill and experience.- Doyle Brunson
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Welcome to kicker school
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson