10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-