10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.