10 Random Poker Quotes

• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers