10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine