10 Random Poker Quotes

• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I'm enough of a dreamer to realize it might have been that elusive something a gambler calls luck. But, I'm also enough of a realist to know that in general we make our own luck - through knowledge, skill and experience.- Doyle Brunson
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.