10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson