10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.