10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher.
-Amarillo Slim
- I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
- Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
- "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
- Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible.
Lisa: Really? Where?
Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
- When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
- You have to piss with the dick you have
- The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts.
-Gary Carson
- I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
- Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright