10 Random Poker Quotes

• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo