10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer