10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• Poker is for loners.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."