10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.