10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"