10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.