10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker