10 Random Poker Quotes

• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.