10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs