10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• God is kind to the underdog! C.A.A