10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.