10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Welcome to kicker school
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"