10 Random Poker Quotes

• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]