10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.