10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain