10 Random Poker Quotes

• This site pulls more flushes than a public restroom!!!
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'