10 Random Poker Quotes

• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Those eggs smell delicious!