10 Random Poker Quotes

• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT