10 Random Poker Quotes

• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph