10 Random Poker Quotes

• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."