10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• This site pulls more flushes than a public restroom!!!
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.