10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!