10 Random Poker Quotes

• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "No river, no fish."
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth