10 Random Poker Quotes

• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus