10 Random Poker Quotes

• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim