10 Random Poker Quotes

• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.