10 Random Poker Quotes

• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.