10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family."
-Uncle Remus
- Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
- "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit"
Stephen Morris
- Fold and live to fold again
- Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
- "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick"
-ItalianAce-
- Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
- Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible.
Lisa: Really? Where?
Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
- Concentrate.
Don't do anything stupid.
Catch some cards.
----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.