10 Random Poker Quotes

• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet