10 Random Poker Quotes

• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery