10 Random Poker Quotes

• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP