10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!