10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Poker is like life, most people don't learn from their mistakes they only recognize them. C.Arel
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.