10 Random Poker Quotes

• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."