10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Fook the floosh droo!
• "No river, no fish."