10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."