10 Random Poker Quotes

• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."