10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear