10 Random Poker Quotes

• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.