10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.