10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is